Roundup #50 š„±š
Am I self-caring right?, humanizing yourself at work, inflation and crypto, 2023 Honda CR-V, and a comment on pride.
Welcome to The Boring Gay Roundup! The gay experience, career, money, and cars from a boring gay in <5 minutes.
Lexicon
First off, happy 50th newsletter to me. I hope you all enjoy these and it would mean a lot if you forwarded them to a couple of people you know! Now, for my regular rantingā¦
Self-care stresses me out. Itās important, but the idea of how to do it is stressful for me. People constantly say you have to take care of yourself, and I often feel pressured to prove that what Iām doing is valid self-careā¦often to people who donāt even matter (like a random coworker asking about it). Self-care to them might be an elaborate vacation or a luxurious spa weekend. I might enjoy those things, but I consider them stressful to execute and afford. Theyāre more of an indulgence than self-care to me. To me, self-care doesnāt cost much money, doesnāt require much effort, and puts you in a state of rest. That happens when Iām watching tv, reading a magazine, getting some boba, or window shopping on Zillow. Sometimes it might require a little effort - like if I want to be laying by a pool or need to order some food, but itās not an elaborate effort. And donāt get me started on proving youāre doing self-care right via social media (which really shouldnāt be involved). So hereās to normalizing basic activities as self-care and validating others when they share their version of care.
Career
One of the easiest ways to get along better with people at work is to humanize yourself. No matter what type of employer we have, most of us act differently at work than at home (and for mostly good reasons). Some of us - me especially - take on more of a sterile corporate persona than we intend to. We become super professional and intentionally exclude potentially likable parts of our personalities from the workplace. While we might be doing this to maintain our professionalism (especially in settings where we deal with an unpredictable range of ages, preferences, and cultures), this habit also makes us less approachable. Iām not suggesting that anyone should entirely change up their workplace personality, but I am suggesting that being a little more real with your coworkers, direct reports, and bosses helps them relate to you. When they know a little bit more about you, they tend to approach you in more calm and friendly ways. They tend to look out for you if itās in their power to do so. It doesnāt take muchā¦little things like sharing one thing you actually did over the weekend instead of always saying āit was good.ā It can be venting about your commute, sharing a movie you recently saw, a place you went with your kid or parent, or a concert you recently attended. And even if you donāt have anything in common with someone, you can still make them feel heard by saying things like āwow - I didnāt know that, Iāll have to check that outā¦ā Iāve noticed that Gen Z is a lot more comfortable sharing and it often makes me question why Iām so guarded at workā¦ as soon as they share some of their humanity, I am inspired to do the same.
Louder for the Gays in the Back
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Money
A couple of big things happened in the last week. One - the latest inflation report finally came in lower than expected and the market took a sigh of relief. That resulted in the stock market picking up significant gains as investors were less worried that the Fed would continue raising interest rates so aggressively. This doesnāt change much immediately - itās still going to be expensive to finance a house or car, and rates on credit cards and personal loans are also up. That said, if you have any cash sitting around you can earn a good amount of interest on it (see my link to Betterment below, which is now paying 3.2% interest for the money you save in their Cash Reserve account with no withdrawal penalties). The second big thing was the implosion of crypto exchange FTX - one of the biggest players in the game. Some articles revealed that the company had lent billions to its own hedge fund without telling anyone, which resulted in one of its biggest investors selling its holdings, which resulted in the market panicking and everyone else wanting to sell their holdings at the same time, which led to the company not having enough money to pay everyone and filing for bankruptcy. And remember - this is crypto so you donāt have things like FDIC insurance as you would with a traditional cash bank account. FTX is a super high-profile crypto collapse that will lead many consumers and regulators to question the market further. Weāll see how it all plays out, but I bring it up to say that you should never invest more than youāre comfortable losing in risky bets like crypto. It is a market that still lacks significant regulation and is very speculative.
You can email me for a Betterment referral code if you want to use them for investing, which gets me and you free account fee credits for $5,000 of investments.
Cars
Honda does an interesting thing where they redesign almost all of their models in rapid succession. Itās unlike the rest of the industry, which staggers their redesigns, but thereās something cool about walking into a Honda dealership and knowing that almost every car is the latest and greatest. They recently introduced the new CR-V, Accord, and Pilot. Iād say my favorite of the bunch is the new CR-V:
Itās giving rugged Volvo - which is a great look. The base model starts at $31K and is very well-equipped on the tech side. You can actually get a hybrid model with MPG in the 40ās starting at $32K (which I assume is going to be very popular in this gas climate). While CR-V prices appear to have crept up over the years, I think you get a ton of value. For those who needed a lower entry point, the recently redesigned HR-V starts at $24K and is a similarly great option. No hybrid, though.
Check out my recent reviews of the Mazda CX-9 Carbon Edition, Volvo XC40 Recharge, Ford Mustang Mach-E GT,Ā Polestar 2, Mazda3 Hatchback,Ā Honda Civic Hatchback,Ā Mercedes GLA 35 AMG,Ā Hyundai Sonata,Ā andĀ Mazda CX-30.
Comment of the Week
In response to an IG post I made about Instagays who all look the same:
Liked something I said this week? Send me a heart or commentā¦I see them all!