Roundup #53 🥱🌈
Side hustles, asking for a bigger raise, dealing with rejection, and keeping your skills relevant.
Welcome to The Boring Gay newsletter where I cover topics including the gay experience, career, money, and cars. In this edition, I answer career questions from my IG community.
Question 1
How do you deal with rejection? I moved back to my hometown and have been applying to jobs.
Lex: As corny as it sounds, every job I have been rejected from was not right for me in one way or another. I may not have felt that way when it happened - or even months or a year later - but in the grand scheme of things, I believe that rejection should be viewed as an opportunity to revisit your approach and goals. Are you selling yourself short and avoiding applying to the types of jobs you really want? Are you setting yourself up for failure by applying to jobs that require more experience than you have? If your skills don’t match the jobs you’re applying for, can you volunteer or intern in the meantime to beef up your resume? Can you find a mentor in the relevant field to help guide you through the best ways to apply? Perhaps you need to try more custom and creative approaches to applying. For instance, if you’re a graphic designer and you keep getting rejected from jobs, why not apply for a job and show off your skills by sketching out a redesign of the company’s website? That’s just one example of how going that extra step shows folks your skills and that you aren’t just copying and pasting your info. into any job application. Put yourself in their shoes - they’ve got 100 applications on their desk and odds are they aren’t even seeing yours - how do you stand out? Don’t take rejection personally, use it as a sign to tailor your approach.
Question 2
Just got promoted but only a 6% raise. Raised the issue to my director - how should I press for more?
Lex: 6% is of course relative - to the original salary, to the industry, to the level of the role, etc. If you really like your job and there’s more for you to accomplish there that will benefit your overall career, tread carefully. You want to come across as grateful for the raise and promotion (especially in this economy), but also let them know that your skills are valuable in the market. I’d go into any discussion about this with data. Look up comparable roles at competitors and pull salary information from places like Glassdoor. Btw, New York and California job postings are also required to put salary ranges these days so you can also cite those ranges (although some of them are very broad and unhelpful….I.e. $50K-500K). Gather as much data as you can and say something like: I’m so grateful for this promotion and raise and am excited to continue to grow here…my only concern is that my salary trajectory remains in line with industry ranges for similar roles, and I feel that I’m off by X amount based on what I’m seeing in the market. Is there any way HR (or whoever makes the decision) can review some of the data I pulled and help me understand where I’m at and my potential for future salary growth here? This makes it less of a demand and more of a conversation - by virtue of bringing this up, they are likely to look at the numbers and might give you a little more to appease you. If they don’t, you have to decide how easy or likely it is for you to find better pay elsewhere before making any additional demands.
Question 3
You mention side gigs occasionally, can you give some examples?
Lex: It really depends on your skills and how you view a side gig. The most lucrative side gig would generally involve using skills and experience you already have versus doing something that anyone can do (I.e. Uber, DoorDash - nothing wrong with those but you get paid by working harder and not smarter). So you might consider looking up part-time jobs or job postings by small businesses where they don’t really care when you work as long as you have a certain skill (I.e. writing/blogging for websites or social media, office admin. work, web design). There are ways to teach or tutor online part-time that may make sense for you based on your skills. There are sites like Fiverr where you can offer freelance services to others. If you own a car or have extra space in your place you can rent things out for money (Turo, Airbnb). And this is not just me saying things I wouldn’t do myself - I have driven Uber before, I have rented out cars on Turo, I have rented out an extra room, I have used my skills as a lawyer to moonlight for another attorney during off hours, I have freelanced for a tech company as a consultant. It wasn’t always easy or glamorous, but side gigs definitely helped boost me financially when I needed it and also gave me valuable skills/experience. You can also Google top side gigs and get a list of way more ideas, but hopefully this gets you started.
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Question 4
How do I combat obsolescence as I near 50? I work in education and still feel I can contribute in my now-considered old-school ways without snazzy tech.
Lex: One way I think you can combat this is to create a niche for yourself. Be the go-to person on a topic or resource or issue that you enjoy that others might find overwhelming or too time-consuming to learn. When you brand yourself as the “go-to” for XYZ, people will always come to you for it and the reputation doesn’t easily fade. I work with people 40 years older than me that have made careers on being the “go-to” for this or that. You can also become a mentor to those younger than you - just because you might not know the latest and greatest tech doesn’t mean you don’t have critical skills - whether on the subject matter level, how to deal with people, how to deal with students, how to deal with politics, etc. - none of that knowledge ever expires. You might also consider leading a committee, task force, or another group in your field that establishes you as a critical voice to others that need it. The irony is that young workers generally feel inadequate and like they never have enough years of experience to be taken seriously. They may be good at faking it until they make it. You have the one thing people can’t get any faster no matter what tech they know - and it’s hard work and years in the game. Don’t sell yourself short - experience is always the most valuable skill.
Question 5
Thoughts on side hustles - beneficial? Waste of time? A good way to expand?
Lex: I included this question to elaborate on the prior side hustle question from a different angle - folks should really think about what they want to get out of a side hustle before making the commitment. Because they can be quite exhausting on top of your regular job and life. Try to find side hustles that hit on multiple goals. For instance, it might benefit you in your day job to learn new skills and if your side hustle focuses on those skills, you make a little extra money and look even more impressive in your day job. This worked for me when I consulted for a tech company because tech education was something I couldn't get from my day job but a skill that made me look valuable (and I also got paid to do it). The same can be said for teaching, or sitting on a non-profit board, or getting into some sort of local politics - these things can all cross-apply to your job or create networking opportunities. If you are side hustling purely for money (which is valid), find the side hustle that will get you the best return on your time. For instance, I often made more money for less work renting out my car on Turo than being a consultant. All I had to do was wash the car, hand someone the keys, and still had all my time to do productive things. With consulting, I got paid by the hour and really had to put in the work. So if I wasn’t getting the residual benefit of new skills, consulting wouldn’t have been a good ROI for just money. Think those things through to find the best side hustle for you.
Lex’s Plugs
In the market for a car? Check out my recent reviews:
Investing:
With markets down, I am leaning on my Betterment Cash Reserve account. This is a high-yield savings account that you can withdraw from at any time without penalty. Betterment is offering 3.75% interest on Cash Reserve accounts. I am also continuing to invest a fixed amount into the stock market every month via Betterment investing. Although I don’t expect near-term returns, buying into the market when it’s down helps boost long-term gains. You can email me for a Betterment referral code for investing fee credits.
I am also continuing to invest into my Fundrise real estate account. While I don’t expect near-term returns, my lifetime return on Fundrise has been 9.7% since I began investing in 2021. Fundrise is designed to be a long-term investment option. I have referral codes that will reward you $50 just for creating an account. Email me for the referral link. Note: I am not a financial advisor - these are my opinions. Do your own research as all investments involve risk.
Comment of the Week
In response to my post on cliques in the gay community:
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